In Club We Trust29 Images
For Shadows Gather, going out in Denver is her church. “We gather, we love, we sweat, we dance, we accept each other,” she says. “I think that’s what I want my god to be.” As Denver’s resident nightlife documentarian, Shadows doesn’t just capture club culture in the city – she’s part of it. With her signature black feathers on her head, a drink in one hand and a disposable Fuji Neo Classic Mini or Disposable 35mm Camera in the other, many of the people she photographs are her friends. This is the case for her latest exhibition, In Club We Trust: Portraits of the Underground, at Convergence Station in Meow Wolf Denver, open through April 23.
Lately, there’s been a lot of talk about young Americans not going out anymore. To that, Shadows calls bullshit. “Whenever I hear someone say, ‘Punk is dead’, I know they probably just haven’t gone out for a while,” she says. “Young people are still going out – they just don’t drink alcohol as much as they used to and might be going really hard two nights a week because Ubers are incredibly expensive now.” Even Shadows admits she can’t afford to go out five nights a week anymore, so when she does, it’s special. The photos for In Club We Trust were all captured in one night of shooting backstage in a nightclub’s makeshift dressing room. In the series, Shadows portrays going out as a religious experience: a neon-lit world where the dance floor is a sanctuary and every night tells a story.
In an era when America’s queer communities face political erasure, we spoke to Shadows about documenting club culture and taking communion on the dance floor.
When did you start going out in Denver?
Shadows: I’ve been in Denver since the year 2000 and have been going to the bars, clubs and shows since before I was supposed to. I was sneaking in to experience the people and culture. I grew up in a rural town in New Mexico and always felt really alone. When I got to Denver, it felt huge. I remember going to a rave for the first time – I didn’t do drugs and wasn’t really into that type of music, but I would see people helping each other and girls crying in the bathroom with their friends embracing them. There’s a sense of community and belonging that I got into.
How did you start taking photos of underground nightlife?
Shadows: My photography project started back in 2019 when I happened to get an Instax camera for my birthday. I just started going around and taking photos of my friends. Then I found the camera to be a really good tool if I wanted to meet someone because I’m a pretty shy, timid person. After the first night, I went out with my camera, I had this stack of Instax photos. I looked through them and loved them. I showed them to a friend, and he loved them as well, so he encouraged me to start an Instagram page and put them out there. Within about a week or two, I’d gained one thousand followers.
I don’t think it was until I got into nightlife that I realised you can find god anywhere. You can take communion with your friends on the dance floor – Shadows Gather
That’s quick! Did you have any photography experience before that?
Shadows: I don’t think I ever considered myself a photographer, but now, whenever I look back on it, I always have a camera in my life. I remember taking yearbook photos as a great way to get out of school, and I always had a camera to take pictures at family functions. I’ve never had a professional camera; I’ve always used these toy cameras. So it wasn’t until a couple of years ago that I started considering myself a photographer. It all happened so naturally.
Tell me about the night you captured the photos in this series.
Shadows: This exhibition was all taken in one night. This was me going to an alt-drag show at a bar in Denver called Trade. These are all my friends, so the producer of the show allowed me behind the scenes. Backstage happened to be a semi-trailer out back at the bar, so I took photos of everybody getting ready and then glamour shots of the performers once they were done. I just really wanted to tell the story of that night.
What was the highlight of that night for you?
Shadows: It’s funny because, looking back on that night, it all felt natural. I was having cocktails; I was chatting. I was sitting there in the dressing room with my hair and my feathers, and we were gossiping out in the smoking section. I love being able to step behind the scenes and watch my friends get ready and then see them come to life and get animated when they perform. It’s a fun transition, and I like to live in this world of contrasts.
Why do you think it’s important to capture queer spaces in America right now?
Shadows: I can’t speak for everyone when I say this, but sometimes it’s hard to be yourself. You might not feel accepted by your family or the general public, but nightlife is somewhere you can always go. Maybe you don’t feel like you can go to the grocery store and be yourself, but queer bars are a place you can leave your worries behind. You don’t need to talk about politics. When we’re out, we’re leaving the work week and our daily lives in the past, and we’re gossiping. When we go home from work, we’re sewing sequins and putting together our outfits. It’s an escape.
I really like the name In Club We Trust. What does that mean to you?
Shadows: Whenever I look at these photos, I see religious tones. It had me thinking about growing up in a church and going to Sunday school. It was a place where I never felt super connected, but I always wanted to believe in something and have a family. I don’t think it was until I got into nightlife that I realised you can find god anywhere – you can take communion with your friends on the dance floor.
Visit the gallery above for a closer look.
