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Paloma Faith has opened up about the “lonely” reality of being a single mother after she threw a birthday party for her youngest daughter over the weekend.
The “Upside Down” singer split from French visual artist Leyman Lahcine, the father of her two daughters, in 2022 after 10 years together.
In a new Instagram post shared on Tuesday (25 February), Faith discussed her sadness after her two daughters went off to their father’s house after she threw her youngest a birthday party at their home.
Faith shared a picture of herself looking fed-up while sitting alone at a dining table, surrounded by party balloons and decorations.
She wrote in the caption that the day was filled with “joyous screams, jelly and ice cream” but when the children left for their father’s house just hours after the party, the house was empty and loneliness kicked in.
“Joyous screams, jelly and ice cream, balloons popping, hysteria and loud music. And then they left, running off to their father’s house because it was ‘his night,’” she said.
Faith added that she was left wondering if she was “fat and ugly now or just cold and tired, after being kept awake by excited children the night before”.
She continued: “The sound, the frenetic energy completely stopped. The promise of other kids screaming outside, hoping it was my own, saying they couldn’t bear to leave and wanted to come back. But it wouldn’t be. It shouldn’t be. They need both parents.”
“So they hugged me on their way out, smiling, saying, ‘Thank you, Mama, for the best party ever.’”
“And then I was there, worn out, glazed, wondering if I should spend the rest of my free time tidying their mess or go and drink three margaritas and smoke roll-ups… This was lonely.”
The singer was met with messages of support from her followers, with one person writing online: “Thank you for articulating the emotional rollercoaster of single parenting/co-parenting. These hard bits are rarely talked about and alien to those who don’t have to experience this!”
Another fan added: “The part of co-parenting no one talks about. People say you must be lucky to have the spare time but you didn’t have kids to have them half the time. Hugs.”
“I’m so proud of how you’ve posted this,” said one fan. “So many of us mums feel this. You’re not alone.”
Speaking about her breakup in an interview with The Independent in 2023, Faith said: “People always ask, what did you do? What did he do? But it was a fundamental breakdown that we were both in control of saving or letting go.”
She added: “You either grow together, adapting to one another like expandable foam and filling the gaps where it’s empty – or one person grows and the other stays the same,” she says. “And I think for me, becoming a mother was such a massively life-changing experience that for the first time in my life, I needed more than nothing – and the expandable foam just wasn’t there.”
