I was the ‘tradwife’ pop star who sang for Trump, he was a rich baseball player… then came the pastor affair smears and a dark truth emerged

When Julianna Glasse saw her phone light up with a call from her pastor, she hesitated.

It was the fourth time he’d been in contact in a month. She knew exactly why he was calling. He was desperate to persuade the then-Christian pop singer to return to the conservative evangelical church she had left following a crisis of faith.

He didn’t berate her, Julianna recalls in an exclusive interview with the Daily Mail. He was, she says, ‘too clever’ for that. Instead, he tried to soothe her back into obedience.

‘Come back to Christ,’ he said. ‘You’re safe here and we love you.’

Julianna said ‘no’ just as she had in each of the previous calls. Because, after three decades of what she calls indoctrination she had made up her mind. She wanted to live her life, she says, free of oppression and subservience to men like her husband and father.

That decision led to the end of her relationship with the church to which she had belonged since childhood and the high-profile dissolution of her fifteen-year marriage to Major League Baseball player, Ben Zobrist.

Now Julianna is telling her story – or rather a carefully curated version of it. There is much she won’t say – her ex-husband’s name for example – and much she won’t address – the nitty gritty of her divorce, the allegations therein and the part that she may have played in the failure of her marriage.

She has a convenient reason for this. She signed a Non-Disparagement Agreement as part of her divorce effectively sealing the vault on what was widely reported at the time as ‘ugly.’

The publicity that surrounded the split was largely due to 43-year-old Ben’s stellar sports career. The father of the couple’s three children played for a host of baseball teams including the Tampa Bay Devils, Oakland Athletics and Kansas City Royals before signing a $56 million contract with the Chicago Cubs in December 2015.

He and Julianna had married in 2005 and separated in May 2019, the same year Julianna left her fundamentalist church.

Today she won’t divulge what constituted the ‘inappropriate marital conduct,’ which she admitted in legal papers filed in 2020 in response to Ben’s petition for separation. Nor will she speak to the nature of the ‘inappropriate marital conduct’ of which she, in turn, accused Ben. He has never spoken publicly about the matter.

Ben was less reticent in a lawsuit he filed against former friend and ex-employee Byron Yawn, then a pastor and elder of the Community Bible Church in Nashville, Tennessee. He accused Byron of using his position as a trusted religious leader and counsellor to encourage an ‘illicit relationship’ with Julianna.

Julianna is adamant that her friendship with Byron only blossomed into romance a few months after she split from Ben, but her clearly embittered ex still brought a lawsuit in which he alleged both an affair and fraud.

According to Ben, Byron – once the Executive Director of the baseballer’s athlete support group Patriot Forward – continued to cash his $3,500 paycheck for two months after leaving the job.

Byron denied any wrongdoing and Ben dropped the suit in August 2021, three months after he had filed it.

But it is not her colorful personal life, but her spiritual transformation that Julianna wants to focus on. She has now set up an organization to help other women escape the sort of religious coercion which, she says, she once experienced. She hopes to help them question and re-evaluate the beliefs with which they’ve been raised.

Certainly, there is little doubt that, for many years, Julianna accepted the religion into which she was born.

She describes her home in Iowa City, Iowa as an ultra-religious evangelical one. She kept a daily journal citing scripture and went to church at least three times a week. At Christmas, before she and her five siblings – all of whom were homeschooled – were allowed to open their gifts, they took turns to read bible verses and tell the nativity story.

‘It never occurred to me to question anything. Instead, I was compliant, modest, and well behaved,’ the 40-year-old says.

Her father gave her a purity ring to wear on her wedding finger at the age of 13. It symbolized her promise to her family and her future spouse that she would not have sex before marriage.

Julianna, who would go onto become a successful singer, stayed firm in her commitment while studying music at Belmont University in Nashville.

She met her husband-to-be Ben through her brother-in-law at the age of 20. According to her, he was a conservative evangelical Christian, and her father sanctioned their marriage a year after they started dating.

Julianna’s worldview was, she says, one in which, her father was the spiritual head of the family and she had always accepted that, once she was married, her husband would occupy that role.

‘It didn’t feel difficult or oppressive,’ she says. ‘It seemed the right thing as a good Christian.’

She claims that women in her church were considered sinful if they didn’t agree to regular sex with their spouse. They were also allegedly instructed to wear modest clothing, never show cleavage and hide their figures as much as possible, which might all seem slightly at odds with the singing career Julianna was forging at the time. She released two EPs and an album. Two of her singles made the top of the Christian Billboard charts.

She is well aware of just how privileged her lifestyle was. She travelled around America and other countries, often with her children — whom she home schooled — and their nanny and grandmother. Meanwhile, she proudly watched Ben as his baseball career took off.

Julianna assumed her future was all mapped out. Until she began reading books given to her by less religious friends and, she says, everything changed. Her intellectual horizons began to expand as she became interested in philosophy and romantic poetry.

‘Literature sowed seeds of spiritual doubt and intellectual awakening in my mind,’ she says.

Those seeds began to really bear fruit with the birth of her third child — a daughter – who was born in December 2015.

Five days earlier Ben’s team, the Kansas City Royals, had won the World Series.

It is tempting to wonder why the birth of her first two children didn’t have the same seismic impact on her belief system. But that, like so many things, is something upon which Julianna will not expand.

Instead, she would have us believe that picking up a copy of Plato’s Allegory of the Cave and birthing her third child was all that it took for the scales to fall from her eyes and for her to reject the fundamental Christian tenet of original sin.

According to Julianna, gazing down at her newborn child, she simply couldn’t believe that this infant was tainted by evil.

Another epiphany was getting to know two gay men who lived next door. Julianna had been raised to believe that homosexuality was wrong. Listening to her neighbors speak, Julianna recalls being overwhelmed by one thought, ‘My faith hurts people.’

Suddenly, after a lifetime of what she now deems ‘indoctrination’ Julianna started seeking out different views in a series of small rebellions.

She befriended a group of women whom she jokingly called her ‘Christian drinkers.’ The group would drink wine in secret during Bible study and invited her to join them at local bars. It felt scandalous at first, but she agreed.

Once, when the women came to watch her perform, Julianna told them how fabulous they looked in their fashionable clothes. They said their husbands would never have allowed them to go out like that, so they’d changed in the car on the way to the concert.

But according to Julianna her fascination with books by secular authors was beginning to have repercussions for her within the church.

In 2016, she was told that if she came out in support of the LGBTQ community, she’d lose the deal she had with a Christian imprint. The book was supposed to have been a self-help guide for teenage girls, and she had signed a statement of faith as part of the contract.

Then, in 2017, Julianna was asked to perform for President Donald Trump at a prayer breakfast in Washington DC. There was a time in her life when this would have been a great and uncomplicated honor. Instead, it was a trial. She simply no longer believed in the words she sang from the gospel.

Perhaps it was inevitable that, in the midst of all this spiritual upheaval, her marriage to Ben was imploding. While she continues to draw a veil over the details of the breakdown she will say only that he had become emblematic of the life she’d led so far.

She felt trapped and oppressed.

Julianna filed for divorce in May 2019. She was 36 years old. Ben, in the only public indication of how hard the process must have hit him, took a four-month leave of absence from the Chicago Cubs and reportedly lost roughly $8 million during that time.

Julianna moved into an apartment in Nashville and she and Ben shared equal custody of the kids.

According to Julianna, the split was considered shameful because it went against everything the church taught about the sanctity of marriage. She makes no mention of any burgeoning relationship with her one-time pre-marital counsellor, Byron.

By her account the relationship was only deemed an ‘affair’ in the eyes of the conservative evangelical church and Tennessee state law, because her divorce from Ben wasn’t finalized until two years later, in 2023. At the very least the relationship, and the lawsuit Ben briefly pursued seeking $6million in damages from his former friend, complicated the already difficult break up.

As for Julianna, when she formally left the church in May 2019, she claims that fundamentalist leaders across America publicly denounced her as a heretic.

The pastors’ apparent fury spread to their congregants. People boycotted Julianna’s music. She was even told that there were ceremonial burnings of her books. ‘I’m going to shoot you,’ someone allegedly wrote in a letter. ‘I’m going to run you over with my car,’ apparently said another.

Julianna told the Mail that she had to hire private security guards to protect her family.

It was all too clear to her, she says, that, ‘When you have lived within the folds of this religion, you must either conform or you will be crushed. The mercy and grace that this religion preaches, they have no stomach to give. They are waiting for their next victim to openly crucify, which in turn, keeps everyone else in line.’

According to Julianna, the phone calls she received from her pastor were relentless.

It was during his fourth call that she allegedly pointed to a truth that he couldn’t deny. He’d repeatedly told her that he and the church loved her. ‘If you love me so much, name one of my children,’ she said. He was, she says, lost for words.

‘I said, “You don’t love me,’’ Julianna recalls. “‘You don’t even know me. What you want is my shame. The shame you’re trying to cast at me is yours, not mine.’

The calls from the leaders of the church stopped after Julianna’s lawyers sent them letters of cease and desist.

From there, Julianna rebuilt her life. She was accepted to Oxford University and went back to college in 2023. She received a degree in advanced management and leadership at Oxford’s Saïd Business School. Since then, she has visited nations such as Japan, Morocco and Israel to hear stories from women dominated by both men and religion.

Perhaps it is a little breathtaking that Julianna should compare her privileged life of ‘oppression’ to that of women living under Sharia law, say. But she insists, ‘I heard the ways their oppression looked very different from mine. But I realized that the internal oppressors were the same: shame, fear, isolation, and psychological manipulation.’

Julianna brought her children on some of her travels and is now on amicable terms with Ben who retired from baseball in 2020.

Earlier this year, she founded her organization, This Is What Happens When Women Read. She says the name is a reference to a man in the church who uttered the words as a criticism of her. But far from being cowed, Julianna says, ‘I have turned it into the anthem of my liberation.’

The movement has set up an international scholarship for women who want to leave — or have already left — extremist faiths. It challenges indoctrination through the mediums of poetry, meditation, philosophy, and psychology.

‘If you’re in an institution, a job, or a relationship that doesn’t honor who you are becoming, it’s time to break free,’ Julianna says. ‘If you’re trapped in a room then throw a chair through the wall. If the building is burning, crawl out of that second story window and save yourself. I will never judge a woman who sets herself free.’