I was looking forward to a gossipy lunch with my old friend until she made a shocking request for money – and I was horrified by the reason: GULNAZ BRENNAN

Gulnaz Brennan had been looking forward to a gossipy lunch with her old friend. Both successful career women, they always had so much to talk about.

So Gulnaz couldn’t hide her shock when – instead of the usual chat about the latest books and movies – Maria* asked if she could borrow £100.

‘I just need to buy some groceries,’ she whispered. ‘I promise I’ll pay you back.’

Looking around her friend’s beautiful home, with its state-of-the-art kitchen and carefully chosen furnishings, Gulnaz was dumbfounded.

‘On the surface, my lovely friend had it all,’ she says. ‘I simply couldn’t understand why she could possibly need to borrow money.’

But as Gulnaz began to probe, the truth came tumbling out. Maria’s boyfriend was bleeding her dry.

At the start of their relationship, he’d wooed her with champagne and chocolates and couldn’t do enough to please her. There had been theatre trips and expensive meals out – all of which he insisted on paying for.

But, as the months passed, he had changed. Gradually, Maria had found herself paying for more and more.

‘Quite simply he slowly took control of her finances,’ explains Gulnaz, 55, a former teacher who has been nominated in this year’s Inspirational Women Awards for her empowering work teaching victims of domestic abuse how to become financially independent.

She adds: ‘He took her debit card away – saying she didn’t need it while she was with him – and then started using it himself.

‘He started driving her car for his own work. Then he said he loved her so much he couldn’t bear to be apart from her. She was so touched, she agreed he could move in.

‘Once he had his feet under the table, he never paid a penny. All the bills landed at her door and now she was sinking under the weight of them.

‘As is common with this sort of abuse, it took her a long while to admit to herself what was happening. She’d been too embarrassed to say anything to friends.’

Horrified, Gulnaz lent Maria the money while begging her to get rid of her boyfriend. However, it took many more months and a lot of support before Maria had the courage to tell him to leave.

‘I was hugely relieved,’ says Gulnaz, who lives in Bolton with her husband Michael, 56, a retired management accountant.

‘But it left me blindsided. How did such a competent woman end up in this mess? The more I thought about it, the more I realised there are so many women like Maria falling into financial abuse. And often it’s because they aren’t taught how to recognise the signs.

‘Too often, women just don’t talk about money. So many of us don’t understand that it’s vital to stay in charge of our finances and not let anyone – even a partner – take over. And that leaves us at a huge disadvantage.

‘I know of several women who’ve ended up in debt because their husbands took out loans in both their names. They signed the paperwork without even looking at it. The shame and stigma that surround financial abuse and coercion keep people from seeking help.’

She adds: ‘Maria’s story made me think about my own mother. She was a housewife, married to my father, a successful businessman who was always generous. Yet she longed to be economically independent – to earn her own money and be valued for her own achievements.

‘She had an enterprising spirit, investing her modest savings in friends’ and family businesses. However, she lacked the financial knowledge to navigate the complexities of investing, leading to repeated losses.’

Determined to help women like Maria, in July 2019 Gulnaz set up a Community Interest Company and launched a financial wellbeing campaign, the Let’s Talk Money initiative.

Two years ago, she won £10,000 in funding and since then her success has been astounding.

Gulnaz now runs monthly seminars, podcasts, webinars and networking events around Bolton, helping thousands of women.

She has even persuaded members of the Greater Manchester Chamber of Commerce to offer job interviews to women escaping abusive relationships. Thanks to the initiative, women who gave up hope are now working.

‘It’s wonderful to see,’ says Gulnaz proudly. ‘These are women who had ended up losing their homes and taking shelter in a refuge. They desperately needed help rebuilding their lives. I have a great network of businesswomen to call on now.

‘We mentored these women, helped build their confidence and then persuaded employers to give them a chance.

‘I’m passionate about facilitating economic independence. Money isn’t just for paying bills or securing a roof over your head. Having your own money gives you choices, power and security.’

As part of a wider drive to help women in her community, Gulnaz also runs the She Inspires award scheme. The scheme, sponsored by businesswoman Jackie Hyde, hands out an annual award of £1,000 to budding entrepreneurs to help them take that extra step.

Recipients include two women launching a fashion website, a dog groomer and a woman setting up a bereavement cafe.

‘It’s all about helping women at grass-roots level,’ says Gulnaz. ‘We don’t just give money, we also offer mentoring and advice. The idea is to hold women’s hands in those early days so they can find success and help others down the line.’

Gulnaz fears the next generation will be even more vulnerable to financial exploitation and is taking steps to help. Last year, she launched a programme to set up financial workshops in schools.

‘I’m convinced there’s a greater need than ever for girls to understand how money works,’ she says. ‘Go on social media and influencers are bombarding young girls with all the fabulous things they can buy – but not mentioning the debt they’ll rack up.

‘The more we become a cashless society, the easier it is to spend. And the results can be calamitous. I am convinced that a world where girls are financially empowered is a world where they have control over their futures. That’s what I want to see.’

* Maria’s name has been changed. Visit sheinspires.org.uk to find out more about Gulnaz’s work.

Do YOU know an inspirational campaigner, carer or activist? Here’s how to nominate her for our awards

We all know them – the women determined to make a difference in their communities. That might be by raising funds, championing underdogs or campaigning for causes. That’s why we’ve launched the Daily Mail’s Inspirational Women Awards 2025, in partnership with disability charity Sense, and sponsored by Marks & Spencer. We want you to nominate extraordinary women from every walk of life. Five finalists will be chosen to attend a charity gala on Thursday, June 5.

Each winner receives a crystal trophy and a £500 M&S gift voucher. There are no cash alternatives to the prizes. Full terms apply. Read before entering at dailymail.co.uk/inspirationalwomenawards2025.