Are they stressed because they have too much work on? Offer to take some of it from them. Do they have an unstable personal life? Try to avoid any sensitive subjects that surround that.
Once you know your boss well, you can tailor your communications to their preferred method. Some might want regular email updates on your progress, or face-to-face might be more their style. Whatever it is, understanding how they operate is important.
Your mental health is more important than any job ever will be.
Set clear boundaries where possible
A boss who doesn’t have their own clear boundaries will usually try to blur yours, so you must be firm in return. If you need to finish work by a certain time each day, or are feeling overloaded, you should mention it to them.
The key here is to be polite but clear in communicating your boundaries. If you don’t set any, either with yourself or with them, then they’re more likely to be trampled over. Take the initiative and explain what your limits are and – more importantly – why you are setting them.
One tactic is to get your manager to agree to the reason that boundaries are important first, like ensuring your work quality remains high, before detailing the limits you need to get there.
Document everything
Bad bosses have ways of drawing you into bigger fights within the organisation, and one of your best lines of defence is to record everything you do.
This might seem cumbersome, but the art of taking minutes of every meeting, or confirming actions in writing before doing them, is something that will stay with you long after your boss has gone.
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I know this might seem like you’re being overly defensive, but the added insurance you get from having clear contemporaneous notes documenting what’s going on in your office or team might just save you one day.
Don’t fight fire with fire
As tempting as it is, resist the temptation to drop to the level of a bad manager. Toxicity in the workplace can be contagious, so try your hardest to stay above the fray.
If your boss is negative all the time, stay positive in their presence. If they like to gossip about everyone in the office, refuse to join in.
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The best way to deal with a bad boss is to tune into your own intentions and actions, and not take the bait along with them.
Get outside help
If things get seriously bad, go outside your immediate bubble and seek some help. This might be HR, depending on the situation, or your support network outside of work. Often getting a fresh perspective from someone who isn’t under the power of your boss can help you find a way through.
Finally, you can always look for work in a different department or company. Your mental health is more important than any job ever will be, and if the five tips above fail to help, sometimes the best solution to a bad boss is a new boss.
Tim Duggan is the author of Work Backwards: The Revolutionary Method to Work Smarter and Live Better. He writes a regular newsletter at timduggan.substack.com
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