Everyone, guess what!! Chris Martin just solved colonialism! Years of generational trauma can wrap it up!
During Coldplay’s recent Mumbai concert, the singer decided to take a detour into historical diplomacy that left the internet both cringing and cackling.
Martin addressed the crowd of 75,000 fans with a statement that was part apology, part awkward acknowledgment of Britain’s colonial past.
“It’s amazing to us that you welcome us even though we are from Great Britain,” Martin told the audience.
“Thank you for forgiving us for all of the bad things that Great Britain has done.”
I must have missed that forgiveness memo.
For those who might need a refresher on why Chris’ apology falls flat, let’s take a quick trip down the blood-soaked memory lane of British colonialism in India. The British Raj, lasting from 1858 to 1947, was a period of direct British rule that basically turned India into their personal playground. They mastered the art of “divide and rule”, messing with borders and local politics.
The British stripped India’s manufacturing power, turning a once-global economic powerhouse into a raw material supplier and convenient market for British goods.
While they built railways, it wasn’t out of kindness — more like a convenient way to cart off resources. Multiple famines, millions of deaths, and a completely transformed social landscape later, the British finally packed up in 1947, but left a world of pain in their wake. Even today, the shadows of colonialism loom large over India.
So, when Chris dropped a casual “thanks for forgiving us” at a concert, the internet predictably lost its mind.
“Chris Martin apologising for colonialism at a concert is peak ‘sorry with a side of vibes,’” one X user perfectly summed up.
“Ok I guess?!? I’m pretty sure they didn’t forgive y’all,” said another.
“Nothing says ‘reparations’ like a Coldplay concert,” one user wrote.
Some fans tried to give Martin credit for good intentions. “I love him and his heart but no baby don’t say this please,” one comment read.
In the end, Martin might want to stick to what he does best: singing about stars, feelings, and imaginary paradises. If he really wanted to start on the reconciliation road, I’m happy with cheque or cash.
Lead image: Getty Images / X
