An author has revealed what the one sign of good parenting is – and it may come as a surprise to many moms and dads out there.
The revelation was made by Alain de Botton, a London-based author who writes ‘essayistic books’ that have been described on his website as a ‘philosophy of everyday life.’
Some of his titles include The Pleasures and Sorrows of Work, The Architecture of Happiness and Art as Therapy.
He shared this parenting pointer during an appearance on the 20VC podcast with Harry Stebbings this week, of which a clip was posted on TikTok.
‘A marker of good parenting is that your child doesn’t have any wish to be famous,’ de Botton bluntly revealed.
When probed on why that was, the author explained that it has everything to do with validation.
‘It means that they have an internal system of validation, rather than an external system of validation,’ the documentary creator shared.
‘They are not seeking to be known by strangers, they can be content to be known by a small circle of people that they actually know back,’ he continued.
The revelation was made by Alain de Botton, a London-based author who writes ‘essayistic books’ that have been described on his website as a ‘philosophy of everyday life’
‘So it’s two-way rather than a broadcast system.’
In the comments section of the TikTok, de Botton’s sentiment seemed to spark some debate among viewers.
Some seemed to think that his sentiment rang true, while others disagreed.
‘When all I wanted was to be an actress and in the pages of Us Weekly at 12 years old, yes the childhood neglect checks out,’ one person wrote.
Another seconded, ‘I agree! As an actress, ppl ask me oh why not do reality tv, bc I’m not in this to be famous I’m in this to act.’
‘So true, I would wanna be famous for love and respect; which I have never received from anyone…’ someone else typed.
Other TikTok users, however, didn’t think de Botton had such a good grasp on this concept.
‘What a broad statement. Sure some are seeking validation but what about those who love to make art? Act? Make music? Make fashion? Is there something wrong with expressing yourself for the public?’ one user wrote.
‘A marker of good parenting is that your child doesn’t have any wish to be famous,’ de Botton bluntly revealed (stock image)
In the comments section of the TikTok, de Botton’s sentiment seemed to spark some debate among viewers
Someone else agreed, ‘False! It’s not always about ego. You can have internal motivation but also want to help/heal as many people as possible, wherein you will become famous. Also true of artists wanting to share their art.’
‘I don’t wish to be famous and I had a highly abusive childhood, so this makes no sense,’ a second person commented.
However, it looks like de Botton may be onto something here.
Singer Lily Allen, whose parents are Actor Keith Allen and film producer Alison Owen, once said that the entertainment industry has its fair share of problems for both parents and children.
She claimed that is not a ‘parent friendly’ business and said these children can be ‘starved’ of ‘love.’
In 2022, she wrote on X, ‘In childhood we crave stability and love, nurturing, we don’t care about money or proximity to power yet.
‘Many of the nepo babies are starved of these basic things in childhood as their parents are probably narcissistic.
‘And entertainment business is not parent friendly eg. Touring/months away shooting.
‘It can be hard to see one’s own privilege when you’re still processing childhood trauma, and a lot of these kids haven’t figured that out yet.’
