Aussie woman’s tragic final words – as she chose to end her own life after battle with debilitating disease

An Aussie woman has ended her own life under NSW’s euthanasia laws after years of living with a chronic illness. 

Kay Henderson, 47, passed away through the option of Voluntary Assisted Dying (VAD) on Friday afternoon.

Ms Henderson, who lived in Coffs Harbour, suffered from Marfan Syndrome for years prior to her decision to end her own life. 

The debilitating disease is a genetic disorder which impedes development of connective tissue, which supports bones, muscles and organs.

Ms Henderson was diagnosed with the disease early in her life after she started feeling pain as a teenager. 

But in 2019 this pain became constant and excruciating.

‘My quality of life is … nothing, really,’ Ms told news.com.au before her passing.

‘My days would just be just to wake up, take my morning meds, feed the cats, go back to bed and go to sleep. Then I’d wake up, take the nightly meds, feed the cats, go back to bed, watch TV and fall asleep. That’s pretty much my day to day.’

Ms Henderson had been thinking about entering NSW’s VAD program for years prior to her decision but had only become certain it was what she wanted recently.

It was her doctor who told her about the option to peacefully end her own life a couple of weeks before she went through with it.

‘He looked at me and said, I haven’t seen you for a good couple of months, and I can see just looking at you that your life is totally different now,’ she said.

The pain he saw her enduring and the struggle that life had become for her is what pushed the doctor to recommend the extreme step. 

After he talked her through the process Ms Henderson said ‘yes, give me the [phone] number, let’s do it’.

She mentally prepared herself for what would surely have been one of the most daunting days of anybody’s life, but as it drew closer she said it became easier.

Ms Henderson went for a swim and listened to her favourite music with family the day before her procedure.

Her family hired a big beach chair to wheel her into the ocean and they bought a bluetooth speaker so she could listen to the music while in the water.  

On Friday morning Ms Henderson’s loved ones gathered at the house to say their final farewells. 

They bought fruit and sandwiches when they began arriving at 10am.

‘We will sit around and talk about our favourite memories, what we will miss. There will be a lot of hugs and tears,’ Ms Henderson said Thursday.

‘I haven’t been that emotional yet, I have only cried maybe two or three times. But I am pretty sure that day I’ll be walking around with a box of tissues.’

The doctor arrived after lunch and she got comfortable in bed. 

As they prepared for the procedure Ms Henderson requested they play her favourite song, Cold Chisel’s Flame Trees.

The procedure itself took between 15 and 20 minutes and while it was underway Ms Henderson was locked hand-in-hand with her mother and nieces while friends stood at the end of the bed as she drew her last breath. 

Despite the fact Ms Henderson was only given six months to live by doctors she still needed to jump through several hoops to get approved for the VAD program. 

Two doctors came to visit Ms Henderson on different days to make sure she was 100 per cent certain with her decision. 

After they were satisfied with Ms Henderson’s resolve, both approved her position in the program.

Even after that however, Ms Henderson was still made to wait several days before she was able to make one final call to confirm that she was adamant in her decision.

During the call she simply said she wanted to ‘die peacefully, surrounded by loved ones’. The next day she was told that her slot in the program had been confirmed.    

‘I was excited, that might sound funny. But I was excited. A huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders,’ she said. 

Ms Henderson shared her journey towards the procedure on TikTok where many commenters were supportive while others were negative. 

Some people had begged her not to ‘kill herself’ but Ms Henderson never let it get to her.

The Voluntary Assisted Dying Act was passed into law in NSW in May 2022. Those who are eligible for it have been able to apply since November 2023.