CONTENT WARNING: This article discusses mental health issues and suicidal ideation.
Entertainment juggernaut Abbie Chatfield has opened up about the toll trolling takes on her mental health on her It’s A Lot podcast. The incredibly candid episode comes fresh off the heels of a vile interaction she had while working at the Australian Open.
In a recent episode of the It’s A Lot podcast, titled “SOLO: I’m At Rock Bottom”, Chatfield opened up about her experience being trolled for the last five to six years and how it affected her mental health to a point where she contemplated suicide.
“It’s been five years of being trolled every day,” Chatfield began.
“People are increasingly commenting or DMing really crooked things and really irritating things and things that irk me every single day from their personal accounts. It’s gotten worse since [Donald] Trump‘s gotten in, but in general, I think people are getting way too fucking comfortable on the internet and it’s really exhausting.”
Further in the podcast, Chatfield opened up about the interaction she recently had at the Australian Open, where a man filmed her without her consent while she was at work, only to upload a video labelling Chatfield as “another crumb of the universe”.
“I was at the Australian Open and the day before he uploaded that I was with my therapist speaking about my suicidal ideation to do with all this trolling, to do with feeling like I’m constantly surveilled, to with feeling like no matter what I do, I’m gonna get trolled even when I’m not saying or doing anything remotely ‘controversial’, I still get attacked and abused and trolled,” Chatfield shared on the podcast, which was also shared in a snippet to her social media.
“I’m just honestly fucking over it. Like, I’m really fucking exhausted and I’m beyond frustrated with the way that when I speak about these things or talk about them I’m dismissed, laughed at or I’m made to be some crazy over-reactor.
“At the moment, my suicidal thoughts are just like rampant. It’s like my resting thought is, ‘Fuck, I’d love to take a pill and just go to sleep and not wake up,’ like fuck. That would be so nice.
“When I’m anxious, I think about ending my own life. This is because of this trolling, and because of all the things I’ve listed, it’s been a slow burn and I’m just at a point where I actually can’t do this anymore.”
Alongside the snippet she shared on social media, Chatfield admitted that this episode in particular was “very hard to record”.
“I’ve been hiding the severity of my struggle with for the last year, but lately things have come to a head, fuelled by trolling,” Chatfield penned.
“The day before that video was uploaded by that pig, I was in therapy trying to work through the harassment and my thoughts of unaliving myself.
“I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ll never be able to go a day without reading something negative about myself, which is heartbreaking. I feel trapped in this, but I don’t want to stop speaking about politics and I don’t want to hide away for the sake of insecure ignorant losers.”
Alongside the toll of the trolls, Chatfield also unpacked how her previous domestic violence relationship contributed to the deterioration of her mental health, revealing that the experience left her traumatised and with PTSD.
“There’s this idea that now that with Adam [Hyde] and in a happy and safe relationship, everything is fine and all my PTSD is reversed and everything is happy, happy and I’m able to move on from that abusive relationship,” Chatfield revealed in her podcast.
“It’s getting better but it’s not just ”you’ve got a happy boyfriend now, so everything’s fine.’
“Any issues that me and Adam have end up getting tainted by — I’m not overreacting or being crazy but my anxieties — I get very scared about certain things and overapologise.”
At the time of writing, the man behind the Australian Open has not publicly apologised to Chatfield. But he has gone private and has written “you wish cuz” alongside side the date “12/01/25” in his Instagram bio, referencing the video he made about the reality TV star.
With the toll online trolling has had on her, Chatfield revealed that she had deleted the Instagram and TikTok app from her phone. She also plans to trial disabling direct messages from her accounts, as well as straight-up blocking online trolls rather than restricting them.
Image source: Instagram / @abbiechatfield
